sunnuntai 7. syyskuuta 2008

kännissä olet ääliö


I was out without crutches yesterday and DAMN it felt good! I was first at my friend’s bday party, then clubbing in town. Had fun. Got absolutely wasted. Honestly, it’s been ages since the last time I was that drunk. Actually ‘drunk’ is not strong enough a word for the state I was in yesterday…

People make mistakes and I’m no exception. Last night’s mistake was mr. Ex at whose place I ended up. For some reason I wanted to talk to him about us, have an actual lie-free conversation. Of course, that didn’t work. I did ask him what he wanted from me and he said he didn’t know. He’s always like that, avoiding serious conversations… I cant remember what else I said to him or what he said to me but somehow this morning I found myself in his bed. He was sleeping on the floor! Apparently I’d said or done something to piss him off, oops…

Its funny how I’ve been so attached to that guy the past 2 years or so but this time… it was different. I didn’t feel a thing. I still liked talking to him and all but the sparks were gone, this time for good I hope. I used to think I was so independent and strong but in reality it’s me who’s been played, not the other way around. He was the first one to make me feel anything, the first one I really felt drawn to. And he was totally bad for me. I just hope this was it, that I can go on with my life now.

I don’t really remember that much about yesterday. Probably made a complete fool of myself but oh well, it happens. And I should get the day-after-pill, SHIT.

I should probably update more often (if anyone reads this)

3 kommenttia:

kaffein kirjoitti...

Write write write!

Ainakin imho blogis on yksi kutkuttavasti mielenkiintoisimman oloisista, mutta päivitystä tulee selkeästi liian harvoin. ;> !

Nessa kirjoitti...

Joo, huomaan että säkin olet tavalla tai toisella joutunut hetkellisesti exän pauloihin, tai ainakin seuraan. Mä haluan niin irtioton exästä, se ON pahasta mulle. Hiiten ne exät, vai mitä :>

Ja kyllä, päivityksiä useammin, kiitos ;)

Kaisa kirjoitti...

I'm still here as well :) Just keep writing!